Cwmderi Diary 2018: 17 December 2018 (1st)

"I thought we were meeting for coffee"

Eileen is standing outside the café, trying to get Angela to answer her phone; “I thought we were meeting for coffee,” she says, “I have to leave in five minutes, as I don’t know where Sioned is.”

"Where's my hamper, Eileen?"

Diane comes across the road and demands the whereabouts of her hamper, which was supposed to be delivered this morning; Eileen will get it to her as soon as possible.

Garry is not interested in Diane's hamper

Diane then moans at Garry, about her hamper, but he wants to apologise to Eileen. “If you want to christen Huwi on Seren’s birthday, then go for it – we’re going to christen Seren too.”

"Two of Cwmderi's families, side by side"

This does not go down well with Eileen, but he stresses, “Two of Cwmderi’s families – Penrhewl and the Deri, side-by-side.”

"Ifan hasn't been christened yet"

Diane pipes up that Ifan has not been christened yet, but Eileen protests that they cannot have three christenings.

The more that Diane thinks about it, the more she likes the idea;

Diane thinks of the publicity opportunites

“I can see it now – a double page spread in the Western Post – ‘the Cwmderi communal christening’! Just leave it to me.”

"I just wanted a quiet christening!"

Eileen complains that she wanted a quiet christening; “Was that too much to ask?” Then she sees Rhys running past, but he does not reply when she asks if he has seen Sioned.

"How do I know that Jean is really in there?"

In the Deri, Dani places the urn on the bar, as Cassie wonders, “How do I know that Jean is really in there? Not some cigarette ash or sand from Tenerife? It would be just like her to poke fun at us!

"Are you ready for one more adventure, Jean?"

“Right, are you ready for one more adventure, Jean?”

Garry comes in, and she tells him the family are not coming, but it is Cwmderi’s turn to say goodbye to her now.

"The only climbing she did was to reach the gin optic!"

“Remind me, why are you dragging everyone to the top of a mountain?” he demands, “From what I understand, the only climbing Mrs G did was to reach for the gin optic!”

"She can look down on all of you"

Cassie replies that she can look down on all of them and keep them in line, like she used to do. Hywel comes in and advises that he is not accompanying her;

Hywel is still embarrassed about the other night

“You don’t want me with you, after . . . but I’ll be thinking of you.

"It really is last orders this time, Jean"

With tears in her eyes, she says, “It really is the last orders this time, Jean.”

Garry solemnly tolls the bell

Garry rings the bell to signify last orders; Cassie picks up the urn and sadly walks from the Deri.

"You think that someone like Mrs Mac will be around for ever"

Coming along the High Street, Diane comments to Dai, “You always think that someone like Mrs Mac will be around for ever,” and shouts to Cassie that they will catch her up.

Cassie stands outside the Deri

Kath comes out of the café and sees Cassie standing there;

She appears to be planning something

she has an idea. Iori removes his Father Christmas hat as a sign of respect, but Diane approaches him;

Diane serves another letter from the council

“You ignored the council’s first letter, so here you are!” and hands him another one.

“You and your cronies on the council don’t scare me!” he replies, and goes on to serve another customer.

"Rules are rules, Kath"

Diane tells Kath that people must follow the rules, and Kath announces that she will be attending the ceremony.

"What about Dyff and Jean and the affair?"

“What about Dyff and Jean and the affair?” queries Diane,

"That was years ago"

but is told that was years ago, and that they should pay their respects. Diane’s next call is to Tyler, to talk about organising a christening.

"Sorry, Kath, I can't leave the stall"

Kath tells Iori that they are going now, but he protests that he cannot leave the stall, and is sure that Jean would understand.

"I'll look after it for you . . ."

Dai unexpectedly volunteers to look after the stall for him, but Diane does not need to know.
Kath is sure that there must be a catch –

". . . for a price – 45%"

and there is, as Dai and Iori agree he will get 45% of the takings.

"Sorry, Diane, I'm helping a friend out"

Dai makes a phone call to Diane; “I won’t be there to scatter the ashes – I’m helping a friend out,” then terminates the call, before she has a chance to give him a mouthful.

Diane raises the subject of a communal christening

Inside number 7 she raises the subject of a communal christening; “Huwi, Seren, Ifan, Greta and others as well.

"What does Jason think about this?"

Jason will agree, when I speak to him. Please, Tyler –

"Hashtag; Councillor of the Year!"

“it will look great on Instagram. Hashtag; Diane Ashurst, Councillor of the Year.”

Tyler’s reply is, “Iolo and I want Greta to make up her own mind when she’s older –

"Sorry – hashtag; Tough!"

“sorry, Greta won’t be there – hashtag; tough!”

Eileen is not happy

At Penrhewl, Eileen is still furious about the idea of a communal christening; “This is a gimmick, so Diane can draw attention to himself! It will be for all the wrong reasons – everyone will be in fancy dress for Britt’s procession.

"It's a christening, not a pantomime!"

“It’s a christening, not a pantomime!”

Jim does not want to further inflame relations

Jim points out that they are not on good terms since the Pwll Bach business,

"This must be Sioned"

then a taxi arrives, which Eileen assumes contains Sioned.

However they are disappointed . . .

She is disappointed when Angela gets out; “I thought it might be Sioned,” she says,

. . . to see Angela

and Angela apologises for letting her down for the second time today.

"Are you sure she didn't have an appointment?"

Jim wonders if Eileen has forgotten that Sioned may have had a doctor’s appointment or something. Angela will make a few calls to find out if anyone has seen her.

High above Cwmderi, the prcession makes its way

At the top of the hill overlooking the village of Cwmderi, the intrepid walkers are following the path, and Diane is wearing high heels.

"All the old crowd are leaving us"

Cassie remarks that all the old crowd are leaving them, and she was so sorry to hear about Meic. “There will be some party up there tonight – Glan’s waited a long time for her. I can hear him saying, ‘Jean – where have you been, Jean?’

"She suspected Glan of having an affair . . ."

“I remember that once she suspected him of having an affair – he wasn’t of course – he adored her – but before she realised she was wrong, she had ripped the crotch of every pair of trousers he owned!

". . . he only had his pyjama trousers left!"

“He only had his pyjama trousers left.”

"Cwmderi looks beautiful from up here"

Kath is becoming quite exhausted, and stops for a rest; “Cwmderi looks beautiful from here,” she tells Iori,

She takes a hefty swig from the flask

and takes a swig from his hip flask. They hear a shout, and find that Cassie has fallen down;

"Stupid place to put a rock!"

she blames a rock for her misdemeanour, and while the others are helping her up,

Kath makes off with the urn

Kath seizes the urn and hurries away with it.

"Barry Price, Myrddin Council"

Dai appears to be doing a good trade on the stall when two men arrive, and one of them introduces himself as, “Barry Price, Myrddin Council – you’re selling without a licence.”

"On the spot fine?"

He issues an on the spot fine of £100; “To be paid now!”

Dai argues that it is not his stall,

"I know – they all say that"

which apparently is what they all say; meanwhile Barry’s associate is loading Iori’s cases of goods into a van. “Listen, Barry, you know who I am, don’t you?” and receives the reply that he is Santa Claus.

"I'm the husband of Councillor Diane Ashurst"

Dai pompously goes on, “David Ashurst – the husband of Councillor Diane Ashurst – now, does that make a difference?”

"Is the Councillor's husband going to pay without a fuss?"

He is asked if the councillor’s husband is going to pay without a fuss, or does he want the whole village to know.

Dai is reluctant to part with £100

Dai fumbles with his wallet, muttering about how totally unjust it is, and the rest of the boxes are loaded into the van.

"Sioned hasn't slept in her bed"

Angela reports that Mathew has not seen Sioned weekend, and she has not slept in her bed;

"A night out – one thing leads to another?"

“She might be staying with someone – a night out – one thing leads to another?”
Eileen is sure that something is wrong,

Eileen rejects a call from Diane

then her phone sounds, and it is a call from Diane, which she rejects.

"I'm being Santa Claus today"

Rhys comes in, explaining that he is being Santa Claus today, and hands Eileen a present.

The present is from Sioned

She reads the label, “To Mam, Joyeux Noel, lots of love, Sioned.” Rhys informs her that Sioned asked him to go shopping for her while she is away in France.

"I thought you knew – she's working as a chalet girl"

He thought that she knew Sioned was working as a chalet girl.

“She can’t just go away – I need her here!” protests Eileen, but he assures her that she will be back in the spring.

"It's my fault, Mam"

Angela points out that at least they know she is safe, and if it is anyone’s fault, it is hers.

Eileen senses something is wrong here

Eileen thinks that something is not right here.

Iori manages to stop Kath

Kath has climbed alone to the top of the hill where she prepares to fling the urn away, but is prevented by Iori, who shouts at her not to do it.

"She almost destroyed Dyff and me!"

“She doesn’t deserve anyone’s tears!” Kath rages, “A character, salt of the earth – she almost destroyed Dyff and me – no-one remembers that!”

He warns her that if she throws that away, it will be with her for ever; every time she looks up here, she will be reminded of the affair.

"You're better than this, Kath"

“Do you really want that?” he demands, “Listen, I know you’re angry, but you’re better than this, Kath.

The others are approaching

The other three rejoin them, and Cassie is glad to be reunited with the urn; Anita remarks that they are very lucky to live in such a beauty spot.

"Maggie Post used to plant geraniums in tyres"

Iori recalls that Jean’s front garden used to be full of scrap. “I remember that Meic told me Maggie Post used to plant geraniums in tyres,” Anita goes on.

"Cwmderi would have been very quiet without Jean"

“Cwmderi would have been very quiet without Jean, and not half as much fun,” declares Cassie, “That is why we’re here today –

"We remember the fags, the gin, the laughs"

“to remember the fags, the gin, the laughs – but you were more than that. If life gave you a knock, you knocked back even harder.

"I hope I'm half the woman you were"

“I hope I’m half the woman you were. You were my best friend.”

The ashes are scattered

So saying, she scatters the ashes in the wind,

Iori grasps Kath's hand

and Iori holds the hand of Kath.

"She would still be here, if I wasn't on the scene"

“Do you understand why I feel so guilty now?” Angela asks her mother, “Sioned would still be here if I wasn’t on the scene. She was desperate for me to leave, and I refused.”

"She shouldn't have gone without a word"

Eileen maintains that Sioned should not have gone away without any word, as she knows how busy they are.

"I can pack hampers – and cwtch babies"

“Well, I’m here – I know I’m not a patch on Sioned, but I can pack hampers – and cwtch babies,” she adds, as Huwi starts crying. “Look, let me help you – I can work full-time if you want. I’m fed up with bar work.”

"Well, I do need a helping hand"

Eileen admits that she needs a helping hand, so Angela concludes that the matter is all sorted. “Don’t blame yourself for Sioned going away,” her mother says, as Angela goes to attend to the baby,

Angela's plan seems to have been successful

adding, “As you’re working here, you might as well live here.”

Angela foresees difficulties with Jim, but is told that he will have no choice in the matter.

"It was lovely, but windy"

The mountaineers return to the Deri, and Anita reports to Dani that it was lovely, if that is the right word, but it was windy up there.

"Did you get rid of the stock?"

Iori asks Dai if he got rid of the stock as he promised;

"The council came and confiscated it!"

“Yes, the whole bally lot – someone from the council came and confiscated it!” is the reply, “And I was fined £100, so come on, flash the cash!”

Iori refuses; “You were stupid enough to pay them – I would have told them where to go!” Dai insists that he wants the money this week; “Or what?” Iori demands,

"It would be awful to be in the doghouse over Christmas"

“Back off, or I will tell Diane that you helped me – it would be awful to be in the doghouse over Christmas!”

Cassie inspects the mural

Cassie is standing by the mural, and calls to Hywel, who is on his way to fetch Esther;

"There's mo need to worry about the other night"

“Thank you for letting me focus on Jean today,” she tells him, “We’re old enough and ugly enough to know that there is no need to worry about the other night – mum’s the word.

"It's that little girl who comes first now"

“It’s that little girl who comes first now – you can chase women in the future.”

She intends to leave in the morning, and invites Hywel for a farewell drink in the Deri.

"That bag down there"

Inside, she asks Garry to pass her a bag, which is behind the bar;

A photo of the former hosts at the Deri

“I’d like you to put this up in the bar,” she says, producing a photograph of Jean and Glan, “Then a small part of her will be here for ever.”

"Sentimental nonsense!"

Dai describes it as sentimental nonsense, and Diane recalls that Mrs Mac was one in a million; “Although her scrap and her cigarettes drove me nuts!” Dai remarks,

"I don't know what sort of welcome she'll get"

“I don’t know what sort of welcome she’ll get from Denzil and Reg – and Meic, of course.”

"We'll remember the good times together"

Diane reminds him, “We’re both here, and we’ll remember the good times together.” Angela comes in, having forgotten they were scattering the ashes today;